I love my job but hate the politics and unrelenting demands and bullying that seem to increase monthly to justify the bonus culture and fat cat business practises by those incharge. So I may love my job but I hate actually doing it under these constraints.

With very few qualifications or relevant skill sets it is not an easy ask to find a job that renumerates  one at the same level. Happiness is the key but if that price comes at a lower cost then the results would be catastrophic.

I am by no means old but I am certainly not young. Age is not the important factor here it is the physical abilities to keep going.

Retirement is not an option at present as mortgages and such bar the way let alone the fact that the savings pot is almost empty. However, one must begin to think about it.

And here lies the problem or question. What to do?

Many people have hobbies and interests that gradually take over their lives and work then lessens and the hobby takes over until one day it replaces work entirely. Some love their work that they remain in it regardless of age. This is all well and good but for those of us that do not want endless days of nothing it is all very daunting and reminds us of days gone by.

When I was about to leave school I had to attend a careers advice session. Great, I thought until it was over and I was none the wiser and in this state of ambient limbo I have remained. I am confident that I have attributes and skills way above what I give but sadly they have not been drawn out of me and I don’t have the direction to focus on to show them.

I am not saying I do not have interests. Far from it. What I lack, though, is something “filling the day” interesting. I am sure I am not alone in this.

I cannot retire with nothing to do but finding something that inspires me never seems to materialise. However much I seek, whatever I discover and whoever gives advice it just is not what floats my boat or is so expensive that it is dismissed.

So this is what worries me. I must be lazy at heart. I do not particularly relish the day that I wander into town to sit in coffee shops to read the paper, watch the world go by, walk about a bit till its time to go home for an afternoon and evening of television and bed. Equally, I could not see myself sailing round the world single handedly.

The countdown to retirement is real and somehow between now and ten years time I have to set out some sort of plan to realise that dream.

Life has brought me this far and I am proud that I am beginning to overcome one of my crippling conditions through hard work and looking at things in a different way so who knows what influences are around the corner.

Now these words are not necessarily for me or about me for once but I do have experience in this field and maybe they can be of some little support for others.

Today a friend went to a meeting and had to be in the presence of some drug users and alcohol dependents. For most they would just walk past and, even though they may wrinkle their noses and shun them, just carry on regardless. However, it sparked very dark memories for this person and caused a powerful reaction that made them run a mile.

This is very sad and profoundly worrisome but totally understandable.

Why on earth do these generic meetings have to be? It is unacceptable that others have to be exposed to the socially abusive results that some people cause for others.

It would be better if groups were limited to the sectors of society where one isn’t subject to others odours and slothful appearances.

I hate to discriminate against people who are less capable of self control and who slip into addictions but it can cause problematic reactions for some.

However, if one finds themselves reminded of personal dark days because of certain events then help is needed to bring back some sense of normality.

One way is to flip this situation and use it to move forward as it is far more constructive to realise that their lives are better than they were. Use the positives around them like grand children, friends, a sunny autumn day, the wonderful scenes of seasonal change and maybe the simple things in life that can cause a smile.

The mind is a complex area and can take a lot of twists and turns but holding on to crap memories is something it can do without. Making lists of the dark days and then seeing where or what happened after is a way of spinning this information as later events of happiness may never have taken place was it not for the former experiences.

Bear in mind there is more support out there than one thinks and just because there may not be a physical stick to lean on or a person to hold for comfort there are thoughts and prayers in the ether that can be latched onto for aid.

Don’t dwell on dark memories as there is far more positive energy to be ingested that will make for a stronger and more wiser being.

Life can be shit but without it then it becomes very mundane and average.

Not everyone knows or can experience life alone or life with others. Some choose to be single while many search for compatible companions. Many though have little choice when it comes to living alone and some live with others in unhappy circumstances and can feel loneliness and separation.

This is not a debate and it certainly isn’t a self doubting diatribe on my behalf. I just want to put my feelings and observations on paper as I see them and in no way do I want to belittle others feelings or ways of life.

I have had the great fortune to live alone and with others and I can honestly say that both have their benefits but having company is way better than not.

This has been especially noticeable in a small home where space is not luxury option. Equally, bouncing around a large home can have its drawbacks as one can retreat into areas and not be part of the group.

I’m not saying that we should buy the big slipper and clown suits that allow communal wearing of garments as that would be so eccentric that even a mad hatter would question the logic. What I am saying is that its is great to find a happy balance and have the experience to know what life is like at opposing ends of the scale; albeit at the more comfortable ends of said scale for I have never experienced the devastation of living alone or together without the comfort of a home to live in.

Being single can be wonderful as one can come and go as is their want, can live like a nudist, watch whatever is on the television and just be selfish without being selfish if you get what I mean. The problem with this is that it is very difficult to adjust to a more communal life and activities that involve others. Its cool for a while but can get a bit brain dullingly and boring. I guess it depends how mental or not one is.

So what of life with someone else? My guess is that it depends on who that or those someone elses are and what relationship you have.

Personally, I have been very fortunate to be able to say that each and every stage of my living lifestyle have been, actually, very good. That is to say that I’ve enjoyed family life at home with parents and brother and then the experiment of single flat habitation. From married life with cats to a shared life with a dog, it’s all been good and bad from time to time and I don’t think I would want to change any of it. Its funny how the human can adapt to varying ways and still find comfort.

The main thing I am grateful for, after being advised over many years, was to seek medical help for depression or mind imbalances. For this I will be eternally grateful and would urge anyone suffering to do likewise. It does make a massive difference.

Today I live in a small house with three others and although its a bit cramped it is still warm and full of good vibes.

I’ve been talking about space and the frustrations of not having enough along with the knowledge that moving or extending is not an option due to finances (the lack of). Well I am at the point now that after making a few adjustments (with a few more to come once we have saved) life is bright and I don’t really want to move. I love my little home as it suits my little car and present aspirations so why move to something unknown.

The future is a mystery and anything can change or happen to steer a course but for now feeling companionship is far better than debt and the hassles of stress.

I keep hearing that the Government is committed to building affordable housing and wants to cut environmental waste and embrace a more greener future.

This sounds fantastic but just where are these homes and which sector of society are they aimed at who can afford them?

Certainly not many single income workers or even two income workers come to think about it. The amount of deposit is eye watering even for just a 5% stake.

Maybe this is where our Government should step in to help the developers and rule against massive profits going to chief executives and shareholders when more investment is needed.

We waste millions of tonnes of plastic, paper, rubber and textiles every year and much of this ends up in rivers, seas, landfill or incinerators.

Non recyclable plastics and paper could be pressed together to make bricks, car tyres chopped up for other building materials and once rendered or faced then their existence wouldn’t be noticed.

Solar panels air/ground source pumps and reclaiming rainwater systems are all there to be used to make more efficient homes which require much less demand on the national grid and waterways. Better lightbulbs and electrical systems, lower use showers and plumbing and better thought out formats of home design to allow a much greater emphasis on rooms using space should be enforced and in some cases rooms could be made multifunctional by useful storage or integration.

I know it is expensive at the moment but with help these products would become cheaper as more could be made and sold.

The microchip was a hugely expensive piece of technology 40 years ago but look at is now; just a few pence and a hell of a lot more efficient and powerful.

If the average income of a worker (and vast sectors of our society are included in this band) is between £15,000 and £25,000 a year then we surely need homes starting at £75,000 to £120,000 for them to be classed as affordable housing.

Anything else is just forcing people into rent, multiple occupancy, homelessness or living with parents.

We have a limited amount of space so boxing clever is the only way forward to protect future generations from a toxic environment, overcrowding, a lack of wildlife and dumb use of waste.

The only other option is to have 100 to 200 year mortgages that can be passed on from generation to generation or back to the lender if the family line dies out or the current owner doesn’t want it. These mortgages should be flexible to move from area to area and either upgrade or downgrade according to circumstances.

We must change to keep up with technology and open our eyes to green abuse.

Like most people I get it, no I really do. The NHS is overburdened and dangerously flawed. Money wasted left right and centre by top-heavy management and too many people needing help.

Trying to get a non-urgent appointment often results in weeks of waiting and even emergency consultations are hard to get. Often one has to take time off work, venture out in bad weather or wait until the end of surgery just to get seen. Many appointments are taken up by repeat visits by folk with little or nothing wrong. Paracetamol, rest and a change in diet usually cures the ailment.

So what about online?

At present one would have to sign off from a NHS GP’s list in order to join the online one. This seems logical but what happens if one needs a physical examination or treatment other than a printable, online prescription? Visiting the local GP is not an option as one is no longer registered.

So the answer could be to have your local GP’s surgery offer this same online service. Maybe a triage nurse could evaluate one’s symptoms and if required pass you over to a Doctor. If is is something less sinister then other advice could be given.

This system could also be used for A&E prior to visiting. If its a minor problem then ask to visit their GP or there will be a cost at the hospital. It may even be suitable for the ambulance service.

I am not saying to turn people away who need treatment but many can be treated at home, over the phone or with a simple visit to the pharmacy.

This in turn may cost to set up and require training and different attitudes but in no time at all it could save more lives and cost far less.

So many are connected to the internet today via phone, tablet, laptop or computer and so a quick online question can be done anywhere.

For the more hands on treatments or in depth investigations then a visit to the surgery or hospital could be arranged.

As technology improves society and methods should change to keep up as at present our health and safety is being compromised by a failing system on the verge of collapse.

When buying things does one go for second hand, used and refurbished or brand new?

When selling is it okay to ask for a reasonable price and feel comfortable with selling rather than giving to charity?

Once one has decided to buy a used car for example it’s a minefield and it’s a problem where to look or even start. Who can you trust and what do you need to avoid?

Private purchases can be cheaper than dealerships but warranties and guarantees are seldom given. So if there is a problem then it’s the buyers tough luck which can be very costly. The dealerships on the other hand have a reputation to protect, future business to ensure and legal responsibilities to cover so higher prices can be expected.

On high value items it’s often better to go with the dealerships if knowledge is limited and expensive outlays want to be avoided in the near future.

However, for the more experienced buyers then private deals or auctions could be much preferable.

eBay Gumtree and Amazon and many other online retailers of second hand goods are okay as sellers and buyers have a feedback score to see if they are genuine and it’s wise to check these out before bidding or embarking on a deal. Research potential problems with second hand goods and read the detailed descriptions. If limited on information then walk away.

We all like new things and a bit of bling but sometimes it is beyond our reach so used, refurbed or seconds could be a way or realising these dreams.

One word of warning is to stay away from knock offs, fakes and reproductions. These are so often poorly made, dangerous and lack the lasting quality and functionality or the genuine articles.

If it’s too good to be true then probably it is so research and if in doubt walk away yet again.

I told you it’s a minefield but with the right detectors and thought one should be able to get through to the other side unscathed and armed with a sensible purchase or sale.

Honesty is the way forward but not everyone has this integrity or conscience so try and stay one step ahead.

It’s fun but time consuming.

The amount of traffic on our roads has reached an absurd high and congestion is an everyday experience for the drivers.

Does it have to be this way?

In a nutshell, no it most certainly does not.

We live in a technological world today and many office type roles can be done anywhere there is an internet connection. The productiveness can be monitored remotely and tasks can be emailed as and when needed.

There are vast monolithic structures built to house hundreds of computer-bound workers whos tasks could be done from home. Chatting by the water cooler would be ruled out and bosses may even find production increase due to a lack of distraction from other staff.

Just imagine the impact that would have on our roads. Tens of thousands of people working from home and off the roads, who would normally be in cars or buses. Instantly the numbers of cars and busses would be cut dramatically, pollution would reduce, oil reserves would last longer and accidents and lost hours commuting would be lessened. Stress levels would go down and illness could be cut as germs would not be passed round the office.

The massive  office blocks could be converted or replaced by, much needed, housing and more people would be at home to receive  their online shopping deliveries thus cutting the need for repeated journeys for redelivery.

Add this up and more time could be given over to leisure, a shorter working week or better use of resources. It may even create cheaper services.

Most of all the road repairs would go down as less traffic creates less wear and tear.

It all boils down to management ideals and having the foresight to change how things are done but I guess it will carry on for a while longer as acting like sheep is what drives the average blue-collar worker and their management teams.

Lets work in the densely populated cities and commute miles away to our dormitories, create endless tailbacks on our roads, cram ourselves into underground tin cans but never interact with each other and waste millions of hours a year getting to and from work. How sad is that?

I appreciate not all jobs can be sourced or completed from home but my guess is that many could.

Certainly food for thought and once again they are only my thoughts and they could be way off the mark but it still makes me wonder.

We can all dream, some more than others and some live the dream but what actually matters and can one truly answer the question “what If”?

Three wishes….I guess most would ask for health, wealth and happiness but how much and what?

I hope I am  not alone in thinking happiness is like chasing the end of a rainbow. So maybe one should be grateful of seeing the rainbow and be happy to have the rewards that brings rather than trying to find the end which, after all, could be a let down. Dream the dream and be satisfied with that.

So if one was lucky enough to win a fortune on The Lottery what would that bring? Once the novelty of paying off the mortgage, buying a new car, travelling to unseen destinations and being able to help friends and family had worn off then life goes on.

I could not imagine a life of indulgence or servitude. I can imagine, and only imagine at present, a life of no debt, comfortable paid bills, room enough to breath and being my own man.

So what would I need to answer “What If”?

Well it is quite simple really.

Enough to pay off the mortgage and buy a modest home. Some extra to help family and friends do the same and allow us all not to have to worry about work, bills and the future of our children and welfare as we grow older.

It is  not much to ask for but it is a wild expectation that is flaunted by the overpaid greed of the few who rule over the masses.

When one learns of the plight of working people who are forced to live on the streets because rents and house prices outstrip their income then there is a huge social injustice. These folk are not looking for luxury yachts, penthouse living and champagne on tap which the wealthy think is a right. No all they, and we, desire is stability, happiness and a lack of exploitation.

So my answer is for enough to make a small change and have a balance left over to allow others the same privilege.

Utopian aspirations? Maybe but as I said before we can all dream so don’t give up as dreams do come true; even if for the few.

Now I know I haven’t written anything for a while and there is probably a better set of excuses but time, topics and inspiration have blocked my utterings.

However, I thought I would share my latest third world problems as they are causing many headaches and problems.

It’s all about space or a lack of it and it has been the problem for mankind since the first settlements were built. The only difference is there is less and less available today and the regulations and costs are so high and mind-bogglingly complicated.

Like most people I actually like the house I live in but would love to change a few things. I’m not talking about moving some sticks of furniture or slapping on a coat of paint but physically change some aspects of the home like add an extension, remodel the garage or create another room.

One could simply move to a bigger or more suitable property but finding that extra cash is often prohibitive or too far away from the areas of work and convenience.

Okay, why not remortgage or finance the alterations? That sounds great in practise but in reality it can be the difference between affordability and overspending and anyway is it really sensible to fork out more than the added value of the house’s equity?

Oh and there is that question of space. Not enough and the plans are futile.

When out and about take a look at some of the new homes that are springing up around the country. Not just from the outside but from within. They truely lack innovation of space management. I understand the need for a smaller footprint but then if that is the case then make allowances for it and create use out of all the area inside and don’t even thing about a garden space or parking as there is very little.

Everyone is crammed in together to live cheek by jowel and the developers and MPs think this is just and right when looking at the plans from within their rambling mansions and well appointed apartment blocks. Well let me say it is not. Not now and not ever.

Anyway, getting back to my original thoughts, it is so frustrating to live with a lack of space and privacy and trying to find solutions to these problems is a very taxing one and the balance of happy or unhappy lifestyles is pivotable.

I know having a home at all is a luxury some strive for as living on the streets or from a car is a life of utter endurance but surely every man, woman and child deserves their own space to think, rest and reflect on their days.

I don’t mean to sound jealous or bitter and I appreciate some have and some have less but when you look around and see one or two people in a five bedroom home of which most is unused and then you see five people shoehorned into a two bedroom house where every inch is stacked high with stuff it makes you wonder what we are at.

Its highly unfair and contentious to force the two groups to swap and I, for one, would rue the day it happened but taking the time to look at one’s own needs and circumstances could change the way we use space.

So much space is trapped in wasted hands due to costs, health, sentiment and lifestyle that finding suitable plots or solutions is impossible as a result of supply and demand.

So simply put it is very frustrating to find one’s self in a position where extensions are probably too costly to be viable, a move is beyond financial means and juggling what one has will not magic an extra room.

We all need our space!!! but too often we don’t get it and I’m buggered if I know the solutions.

Please don’t think I am grumbling or getting in a tiswas and I know these issues face many other people. These are just reflections and opinions I have allowed to grow in my mind and its better to write them down rather than keep hold of them.

Thanks….

I realise one shouldn’t believe everything they read in the papers but when I saw an article, stating that schools are going to ban desserts and cakes from their menus in a bid to cut down on fat children, it made me think that the heads in charge are doing too little too late and are suffering from insanity.

Don’t these fatheads understand that the problem runs far deeper than their food halls?

Banning parking near schools, introducing more rigorous competitive sport, and adding healthy lifestyle lessons to the syllabus would be a welcome start and punishing parents who abuse their kids by feeding them so much it makes them obese would help.

Home life could do with more stricter parenting. Limiting phone, computer, games console and television usage is a must and getting the little urchins to move about rather than sit, sit, sit would dramatically aid their welfare.

My guess is that society has devolved into putting children first and we have allowed them to rule the roost.

When I heard about a child being taken into social care because the parent refused to give ice cream and doughnuts and it got all the way to court then I am stunned. Treats are okay occasionally and if they can be afforded but as a normal staple it is crazy.

Then there is the fact that a social worker deemed the parent bad for not giving in a offering crap. She should be sacked and the protocols revisited and adjusted.

Starving children is a criminal offence and is bad for children’s growth but surely the same can be said for over feeding them? They will develop diabetes, heart conditions, skin problems and all sorts of other weight issues but no action is taken against the parents over that. Both are abuse but only one seems to be a legal argument.

So before puddings and cakes are banned please take a step back and think about how things were. Kids have always liked puddings and cakes but until recently there wasn’t a problem as the calories were burnt off during daily life.

So limits should be set and rules laid down. Think before we sink.